Have you ever seen Alfred Hitchcock’s The Birds? I have. I watched it back sometime during my sophomore year of high school. It was on some lazy, late Friday afternoon when I had nothing else to do in an empty house. I watched intensely as the birds revolted against our civil society… and then I drove to a friend’s house. It was quite the drive. Now I know movies are just movies… and I know that birds don’t usually attack people… but I would have sworn staring you straight in the eyes that there were a few robins that gave me some sketchy looks….
The reason I bring this up is recently, I’ve been noticing the birds. Sure they are always around, but you don’t usually notice them. A bird flies up into a tree, he hops across the driveway, or he’s on the grass pecking for worms… these things you don’t notice. But lately… there’s been something mysterious, the birds are organizing!
Just yesterday I was driving in front of an auto-repair shop that had nice grass out in front of it’s doors, and there were hundreds of birds! I’m not talking scattered about, but so many birds you couldn’t see the grass. They were jumping around, swooping in to land along with taking off up to power lines.
Driving to work this morning on the highway, I look up at one certain power line and I noticed the birds …none were moving… They were just sitting there, watching the cars go by. Probably contemplating who would be the first victim.
Have you ever seen birds fly in a flock… or rather… a swarm…? They fly like a swarm of bees do in cartoons… as one entity. How do they communicate? Is there just one bird up front that decides which hairpin turn to take next? Can they just read each other’s thoughts? Can they read our thoughts?
It is already a proven fact that birds have it in for us. Just think about how many times you’ve been driving down some back road at an easy 30 mph when a bird shoots out from no where flying just inches above the ground, across the street. You tap or slam on your breaks (all depending on how daring the bird really is) and hold your breath in hopes that you didn’t hurt the innocent woodland creature. All the while, all the other birds are off the side of the road hootin’ and hollerin’ about watching you jolt forward in your seat. They have a contract agreement with the squirrels on those terms as well.
Back in high school again, I was on a trip up to Cedar Point Amusement Park up in Sandusky, Ohio. We were just walking in to the park, hadn’t even given our tickets yet… when something plops on the top of my head. Yes… a stupid Sea Gull had decided it’d be fun to poop on the silly human! What are the chances of your head being used for target practice??? For that topic I will leave it to one of my favorite bloggers, Scott Adams, who discussed this topic just three days ago in his ‘Dilbert Blog’.
I am sure of it though… the birds are organizing. If you haven’t noticed yet, you will soon. Don’t be surprised, it won’t be long until we start hearing countless freak accident stories on the News about birds flying into the back of people’s heads. You have been warned…