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Jason Pawlak

Husband, Dad, Navy Officer, Coder, and Tinkerer. I have many interests and am always looking to learn something new. This site is a launching point to the many areas of the Internet that represent me.

My Life is Office Space

My life really is ‘Office Space’. Sure I may not be laundering money from corporate or anything, but the atmosphere is the same. That is really the genius for films like ‘Office Space’ and the television series ‘The Office’ (which I do have a Schrute Buck hanging in my cube)… they are true to real life!

On my way back from grabbing my lunch from the break room, I am briskly moving down a long hallway. Down at the other end of the hallway, I see a guy… and he is wearing the same shirt as me. I’m not wearing anything extravagant… but its not the normal office shirt. It is a short-sleeved rugby shirt with thick, horizontal, blue and white stripes. I saw the guy and he saw me… we both knew we were wearing the same shirt… but no one wanted to say anything. I kinda looked down to the ground and chuckled to myself as we walked past.

This morning I got an email reminding me it is the beginning of a new period and time to do the TPS reports… luckily I just hand them out and don’t have to put any new cover sheets on them.

I got another email this morning from our secretary… I mean… administrative assistant… telling me that I am not clocking out for lunch correctly. Hah… of course I’m not, I don’t clock out for lunch. I usually take lunch at my desk and work straight through lunch. It sure beats going to the lunchroom and sitting by myself. Apparently federal law requires that I take a 30-minute lunch break if I work over 6 hours… bologna I say!

Every now and then, I go to print something (yes… on actual paper!) and when going up to printer BN113… I see a little red light flashing. It makes my stomach sink. I cross my fingers and just hope that it is out of paper… but then… to my demise, those two little words that bring so much pain to the office… ‘PAPER JAM’! It is those days I just go back to my desk and let someone else deal with it. I’ll get my printouts someday…

Two Friday’s ago, a different secretary… ahem, administrative assistant came by my cube late on a Friday afternoon with a handful of paycheck stubs. “Someone hasn’t been picking up their paycheck stubs….” I look at her, I look at the stack…
Me: Oh, sorry
Her: Have you been getting the emails I send out
Me: Yes, I get the emails, I just forgot to pick it up
Her: Do you know where I sit?
Me: Yes, just over there (and I point)
Her: All right, well I hope you are getting the emails so you can start picking these up
Me: Thanks for dropping them off

And of course there are the office personalities that are just that… so typical

We have the guy who thinks he’s the greatest and loves to distribute work (because it makes him feel important) I once got an email from him asking if I could post a document to the web. I followed his directions exactly only to find out that the person who normally posted to the web did it their own way (which was the way everyone who accessed the document knew) So basically, the guy got mad at me for posting it wrong… but by following his directions… hah

We have the nice girl who knows everything technical that is going on. She is very smart, very sweet, and very patient. Everyone goes to her when they have questions… I am amazed that she is able to do any of her own work with so many interruptions.

We have the boss that wants to be buddies with everyone. Mostly she does a good job with it, checking in on everyone from time to time, just to see how things are. But she does have her clique and a following within the group. Sometimes I walk past her cube around lunchtime and they are all crowded around her desk laughing about some story and munching on sandwiches.

Yes… basically I work at ‘The Office’… but I am sure most offices are just like this one. Lunch break is almost over though… my half hour almost up… time to staple 20 Support Recaps together before my one-o’clock meeting so people can read through it and criticize everything they don’t like about the format. If only they followed the directions on my email… the reports would look a little better… grr… but that’s a story for another time.


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